Ok, since I doubt that any of you have heard of it, this one’s going to get a lot of explaining, so bear with me.
When I was little, I used to watch an old British show called ‘All Creatures Great and Small’. I recently found it again on Netflix and was reintroduced to its awesomeness.
The show follows the life of James Harriet, a country veterinarian, along with his partner, Siegfried Farnon (Harry Potter’s Cornelius Fudge) and Siegfried’s younger brother Tristan (Doctor Who’s Fifth Doctor). There is so much spanking potential between those two brothers.
First, Tristan won’t care if someone threatens to call the police or a higher authority, but the moment someone threatens to tell his brother, he gets a terrified look in his eyes. When his brother is actually yelling at him he will back away from him, keeping his butt protected, and hide behind his friends.
Second, Siegfried has sat Tristan down to let him know that he will ‘still kick that idle backside of yours if I think you deserve it’, only he ‘will no longer do it in the heat of the moment so that you won’t grow to resent me for it.’ He also asks James if his brother is behaving himself and says how hard it is when at times he’s had to take the role of a father rather than brother with Tristan. He’s given Tristan a curfew (Tristan is in his early twenties, by the way). And in one of the episodes, when company was present and Siegfried was mad at his little brother for something, he pat him on the cheek twice and then gave him a warning smack, as if to say that if they were alone, he would kill him, and that he shouldn’t tempt him further.
And here is just a short sample of what Tristan has done so far over the course of the show:
- Failed his final exams after Siegfried spent hours helping him study
-smokes all the time even though the vet clinic is supposed to be smoke free
-gets drunk on a regular basis
-totaled his brother’s car
-drove the car through the garage
-played a prank on the entire town, pretending to be a ghost
-prank called his best friend
-stayed out past curfew
-messes up veterinary affairs (such as confusing addresses so a sample of infected poop gets sent to someone who was expecting ointment instead of the lab it was supposed to go to)
-accidentally gave a girl a shot in the boob because he was distracted
-lies to get out of work
And that’s just a few of the things. You can take your pick of what he’s getting spanked for in this particular picture. Of course, he’s not the only one at fault. Siegfried is a complete jerk. He will tell Tristan or James to do something one way, then yell at them later for doing it that way, or he will tell them not to do something and then do that thing just moments after he said not to. If there’s a patient that none of them like, say, an aggressive dog, he signs Tristan up to deal with it, he hides Tristan’s love letters from his various girlfriends, and once, after Sieg came back from visiting his mother, Tristan asked him if their mother had asked about him. His response was, “No, and that’s probably significant.” Then he smiled and walked away.
It does balance out sometimes, though. Whenever Tristan is hurt or sick, Sieg will go out of his way to take care of him, and when he’s having a really bad day Sieg usually manages to cheer him up.
Anyway, I haven’t finished rewatching all of the seasons yet, but I think if Tristan doesn’t at least get a swat, I might cry.